Sleep

06:35.
The husband is at work.
The child is sleeping peacefully.
The dog snuggled up on the bed.
You think we’ll just go to the toilet.
Right!!! Here goes,
My toes on my right foot
(not my left which is a change)
are curling under,
which requires me to get in a position only described
as some kind of prying mantas
to physically manipulate them back into alignment.
This takes physical force but relieves the intense pain.
Now that’s done, I can start to try and get out of bed.
Oh. No medication for 10 hours puts pay to that,
I’m as stiff as a board.
Oh and wait.
The recent surgery on my right hand means
I can’t effectively push up in my hand because my wrist is agony.
What next?
Well, I’m perched on the edge of the bed now
pushing some pills in my mouth with the hope
they will soon kick in making the toe curling (dystonia) go away.
Next walking… yes walking.
Madness, I’m 40 – sure I can walk.
Well, yes. I consciously need to tell myself step bigger.
It’s dark, my spacial awareness is shot!
The hairdryer cable is under my foot,
I’m thinking who put that there?
ME!
I get round the doorway,
only to find the dogs toy on the floor.
My inner voice is saying kick it out the way!
Oh no please don’t, but yes disaster strikes.
I kick it, only to hit the wall and land in my path again! What was I thinking?
I’ve made it to the bathroom.
I arrived in one piece but it’s no mean feat and
by now it’s light and the world seems a better place!

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  1. Linda fieldsend

    Arrrr bless Clare you find the strength every morning because you have no choice keep going love x

    1. Clare

      ❤️

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